Ways to Use Presence to Curb Additions

·       Become a compassionate witness not a judge.

·       Stop trying to change with your will power.

·       Bring presence into the addictive act.

·       Witness yourself making the addictive choice with love.

·       Hold space for how you feel before, during and after the act.

One of the ways of dealing with addictive behaviours, not just drug addictions but every kind of addiction, is through presence rather than through will power. Will power isn’t a sustainable solution because it doesn’t address the underlying unmet need that’s driving the behaviour. Under addiction, you’ll find emotions that are too much to bear. The addictive behaviour provides an escape by anesthetising those emotions.

For example, if you are inclined to binge eat sugar it’s likely that you aren’t present in your body while you’ re eating. You may be using the food to escape and disconnect from difficult feelings.

One way to heal is to allow yourself to eat whatever you want without judgment. Don’t try and control yourself. You say to yourself, “Okay, you can eat whatever you want. I’m not going to judge you but I am going to be fully present with you while you are eating.”

Who is talking to whom in this scenario? Your healthy adult self is talking to your wounded self that can’t cope and needs to anesthetise. The healthy self is saying, “I know you are hurting. I know you haven’t had all of your needs met. I can see that you don’t know how to meet your needs. I’m going to be with you and hold space and watch you while you do this, without judging you.” If you show up for your wounded self consciously and actively, you build the readiness for change.

How does this work in practice? The healthy self is going to breathe, ground and feel. What does it feel like to eat that entire tub of ice cream? Following this technique, more presence comes into the body.

Progress depends on the extent and duration of the addiction and the health of your adult self. If you add personalized homeopathic support into the mix, your healthy self will be more resourced and capable of holding your wounded self who doesn’t have self-regulation because he/she is drowning in emotions and doesn’t know how to cope.

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If we broader our definition of addictions, we may be surprised to find that we all have some work to do in this area. Have you ever worked with your addiction in this way?