The Pace of Your Healing is Unique to You. Don’t Judge by Comparison.

Comparing yourself to your perception of how another person is doing is unhealthy in all aspects of life but it’s particularly destructive in healing. Why is she getting better faster than I am? I’m working so hard, doing all of these therapies, why aren’t I getting better as quickly?

First things first, you can never really know what’s going on for someone else. Sure, on the outside somebody may seem better but who knows what’s going on inside. And even if it’s true that your friend is getting better quicker, so what? How does that help you get better? It doesn’t. It just gives you fodder for your own self-doubt.

So next time you notice your mind playing that comparison game try saying, “Thanks for your concern, I’m on my own path, doing what feels right for me”.

Let me tell you a funny personal story. It was 1996 and I was in an ashram in India. My untamed mind was freaking out in the silent meditations. I went to the swami and complained, “I just don’t think I can meditate. I open my eyes and see everyone sitting and meditating and I just can’t do it”. He looked at me and smiled, “And what is making you think that all those other people are meditating better than you are? You just keep sitting. You are doing just fine.” I believed my inner story and thought it easier it was for the others than it was for me. That comparison-based doubt caused me much unnecessary pain.

There will always be part of our mind that resists change of any sort. One of the ways we commonly sabotage our progress is by doubting it.

When we are deeply tangled in the web of chronic symptoms, it can be hard to choose a path and stick to it. Having doubts? Find a practitioner you trust and share your process. More importantly, go within and get clear. You’ll be able to feel if you are on the right path.