You cant command your childrens respect. You need to earn it

I have some things to say from a health perspective about the commandment, "Respect your elders".

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Everyone would agree that it's good for children to respect their elders. The question is how to you achieve that goal with kids? How do you get kids to consistently respect their parents and elders?

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I see some issues with the traditional approach of commanding children to respsect. Nobody likes being commanded to do anything and children aren't any different. Are you more likely to respect somebody that talks to you with respect or somebody that demands respect from you?

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When a parent commands or demands and the child doesn't listen, then what? The situation quickly escalates to a power struggle and the parent needs to pull rank. Power struggles result in fighting and usually some degree of fear in the child. Fear causes contraction which is toxic for our health.

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The best way to teach respect is to model it. Treat your kids like people you value. Do what you say you are going to do when you say you are going to do it. Treat your spouse or partner with respect. Explain to your kids when their words or actions are hurtful with kindness and patience.

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The gentle approach won't make kids soft or weak. It will make kids feel loved and they will project that love back at the adults in their world. Kids that are at ease and relaxed in themselves make good choices, they thrive and they are much more apt to be consistently respectful.